Baseball and G-d

I trust in G-d 
I love my Country 
And will respect its laws 
I will play fair 
And strive to win 
But win or lose I will always do my best 

This is the pledge the players chant before every Little League game, including my twelve-year-old son.  Not only do I cringe every single time I hear the use of “G-d” in any child’s activity, but it’s even more alarming when it is mandated and used at a children’s baseball game.  I realize that a prayer of some sort was invented and widely perused far before Tim Tebow could wipe his own ass, however what does G-d have to do with baseball, or sports in general?

This country is so obsessed with the power of a higher being, one might even say a power of a supernatural (but one would be called insane for using that word), that it’s not only acceptable to use G-d’s name in just about anything in life, but praise G-d for absolutely everything!  What does G-d have to do with sports, and better yet what is G-d doing in a Little League’s pledge?  Basically, what we are teaching our children is that as long as they pray to G-d before each of their games, a supernatural being way up high in the sky will look after you and make sure you win your games!  What a way to instil false hope into a bunch of teenage boys…  Forget teenage boys, they are chanting this so-called pledge at the five-year-old’s games!

All I can think about while the players are reciting this pledge is what about Atheists on the team?  What about if your family simple does not believe in G-d, or anything that comes with it?  What about those same players going home after a game and asking their parents why in the world we have to say that we “trust in G-d”, when in fact we DON’T trust in G-d, but only in ourselves?  Isn’t G-d a bit too preoccupied with more important issues of the world to be worried about some Little League’s baseball game?  From day one, we teach our children to believe in themselves and in their abilities as decent human beings, and to trust their gut when it comes to anything and everything in life.  And then we make them PRAY before school starts and their sports games?  Isn’t it enough that G-d’s name is already in every school as it is.

Parents, am I the only one that’s outraged over this?  Please, send me your feedback!

Is Matchmaking a Mitzvah and how many are we supposed to accomplish in our lifetime?

Attending a wedding the other week of a couple that I introduced, made me think of the many Mitzvot that we are supposed to perform in our lifetime.  Having been somewhat of a Matchmaker since I was in high school, I had never really thought about it as a Mitzvah, or a good deed.  All I did was put two souls together, mainly because I had a feeling that they would like each other and hopefully build a life together.  But as I sat listening to the Cantor during the wedding talking about the Torah, and the significance of all of us performing a Mitzvah, my husband leaned closer and whispered: “I’m so proud, you made all this happen, yet another Mitzvah!”  To tell the truth, it caught me off guard, I had never thought of it that way.  My amateur matchmaking had always been a bit of a hobby, on the side of all my other “real” jobs.  And as my husband would say, a bit of an annoyance and hindrance to our personal life.

So as I started to ponder about all the people I introduced over the last fifteen years, and realized that a lot of them have continued to stay together, and in this case get married and start a family!  I had an epiphany!  I was doing a service to the world, I was performing a Mitzvah each time I matched a couple!  It only took me about fifteen years to come to this realization…  But, then again I am a bit of a slow learner.  Then more questions poured into my head…  Are we supposed to accomplish a certain number of good deeds in our lifetime?  Am I good now?  Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love matchmaking, especially when the two people hit it off and continue dating.  However, it does not come without its problems.

Some of my past “couples” are eager to share their first meeting with me, along with every detail of their dates after that with its ups and downs, leaving me wanting to “fix” the situation.  Others I hardly hear from again until I see a post on Facebook that they are getting married, which brings me to yet another thought.  There has to be some kind of an etiquette when it comes to using a matchmaker, especially my kind of a matchmaker, a.k.a the free kind!  If I introduced you two, and somewhere down the line you decide to get married, along with your first phone calls to Mothers, Fathers, Sisters and Brothers, shouldn’t I be in there somewhere well before Facebook, Shmacebook, Twitter and whatever else?  Is it just me or does something feel a little odd about having to find out on Facebook that the couple you set up is getting married?  Again, maybe its just me.

I also get my husband involved in it, which he happily goes along with screening people with me, trying to look for single and available bachelors at his work, gym, basketball league, etc…  Poor guy is so tired of me waking him up a 2 a.m., only to hear me squeal with excitement because I thought of a girl for my single guy!

So, going back to my original question: Is Matchmaking a Mitzvah?  And how many Mitzvot are we as human beings, and Jews are supposed to perform to be good with the man above?  Or does it not work that way in Judaism…

10 things I love and understand…

1. Don’t you love those people that use ALL CAPS when typing?  What is the thought there?  That unless you use all capital letters nobody will read your email, or that its a lot more important that other people’s emails?  And furthermore the same people that use all caps, don’t know how to spell and apparently have never learned about punctuation marks or anything else that normal people use when writing…  Do you have any idea how hard it is to read an email that is not only in ALL CAPS, but missing commas, periods and grammatically incoherent?  This is an example of an email I received the other day:

I JUST GOOGLED ALL THE GAMES PLACE SO WE CAN HAVE THE ADD:

THIS WEEKEND ON SUN IT’S AT CORNA GYM @ 2:15 THE ADD IS 502 S VICENTIA AVE, CORONA , CA , 92882

THEN 2/26 @ 2:50 AT LA MIRANDA HIGH SCHOOL ADD : 13520 ADELFA DRIVE, LA MIRADA , CA, 90638

AND 2/27 @ 3:25 AT NORCO RILEY GYM 3900 ACACIA AVE , NORCO , CA, 92860

IF WE WIN WE WILL GO ON TO A 4 TH GAME THAT WILL BE ANNOUNCED.

ALSO WE AS A TEAM HAVE TO PAY A $10 FEE TO THE SCORE KEEPER PER GAME  FOR ALL 3 GAMES IT’S LIKE $3.50 PER KID IF YOU COULD GIVE THAT TO THE COACH ON SUN GAME THAT WOULD BE GREAT.

ALSO WAS WONDERING WHAT EVERYONE’S THOUGHTS WERE ON A TEAM PARTY AFTER ALL THE CHAMPION SHIP GAMES ARE DONE?? SHOULD WE HAVE ONE ???

PLEASE EVERYONE  LET ME KNOW YOUR INPUT ON THE PARTY ??

*** TREAT AND DRINK I HAVE SEAN FOR THIS SUNDAY MICHAEL FOR NEXT SAT AND WE STILL NEED SOMEONE FOR SUNDAY’S GAME PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF ANYONE CAN DO SUN??? THANKS IN ADVANCE TO THESE PEOPLE FOR BRINGING TREAT AND DRINK AGAIN.THANKS

Can any rational person understand what the hell any of that means?

2. What about those morons that abbreviate every other word!  I am talking about a long email, not a text that only allows you 160 characters.  Are you that fricking lazy that you can’t even write out all the words in your pathetic e-mail?  How the hell am I supposed to know that ADD stands for address and not actual ADD illness?  Or are you trying to tell me that you have ADD, and therefore can’t sit long enough to write out words correctly?

3. How about those of you that feel the need to post your every move on Facebook or Twitter!  “Going to the supermarket with my wonderful hubby, then for some romantic dinner at Blabetty Blahs”  Really?  Do you really think people give a damn?  Or my favorite one: “What a beautiful day! I want to thank God for my wonderful husband, my perfect little children and my perfect little life! If it wasn’t for God, I couldn’t be enjoying this incredible day!”  Yes, we get it you love God, you are a born-again whatever, you found the meaning of life, you are all of a sudden not a miserable person that you used to be, and even though you used to do crack, smoke everything under the sun, steal, lie and cheat, we get it that now you are a changed person, all because you found… drum roll… GOD!

4. Speaking of Facebook, how about those socially inept human beings that post their engagements, pregnancies, and other special, private moments on Facebook prior to actually picking up the phone to share the news with their family and friends!  I am all for people making making their own mistakes, looking like fools and all that but how idiotic is that?

5. Yes, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Vests!  What a waste of money and material.

6. I absolutely love those people that insist on licking their fingers while eating.  I can not think of a more grotesque habit than that!  Can you imagine sharing food with that animal?  Hey imbecile, that big white thing you just put on your lap is called a NAPKIN, and you wipe your hands on it.  It’s not just there for the food that misses your mouth.

7. How about those parents that refuse to admit that their kid is a brat?  No, my kid would never do that.  You are right, that moron that I witnessed with my own two eyes karate-kicking another moron in the back was obviously not your kid, he just happened to look like your kid who also got into your car afterward, right?

8. No matter what’s happening in the world, everyone blames the Jews.  It doesn’t even matter what it is, wars, recession, Charlie Sheen’s addiction, every single time its the Jews’ fault.  (Read more about that later)

9. People that have to create something out of nothing!  Drama junkies.  Even if there is absolutely nothing, those people will find something to argue about.

10. And my favorite are the women that complain about their husbands losing jobs, yet they continue driving their luxury SUV’s, parading around with their Louis Vuitton bags, and refusing to get a job of their own.